In middle school I was congratulated, maybe even praised,  for showing a little crack now and then. I am not talking about the snorting crack (cocaine), I am referring to the area towards the top of your hind quarters, the butt crack. When did this body part become so indecent? Besides shunning the butt crack, style has shifted in a way that even the slightest bit has no chance of ever seeing the light of day. In addition, society has formed rules in the workplace and school that forbids exposure of the crack. Also, men have taken sexy back. Their minds have gone north and they no longer find the butt cleavage alluring. A woman no longer has the privilege to let her butt crack run wild because the new standards of life has locked it up and thrown away the key.

    Trends dictate what is in and what is out. If burlap skirts were the season's "must have", people would itch and scratch all day to stay up to date. Five years ago low rise pants were all the rage, and when pants rise too low, the crack says hello. As a result celebrities all over the country were being photographed with their butt cleavage hanging out for the world to see. If crack could kill, we'd have all been dead by now. Today, high rise pants, skirts, and shorts are hitting the runways. People have traded in barely-there-items for full coverage bottoms. Consequently, the crack has been captured, tortured, and thrown into prison. We used to glorify what god gave but now we can't seem to find enough ways to put it back.

    The "man" has hid our cracks for way too long. Boss' and principles, they are like crack police. Back in the day, hippies could walk around topless or smoke weed. Now our freedom is dwindling away. For instance in school, if the bottom of your top doesn't meet the tops of your bottoms that's a trip to the principal. Casual Fridays invite jeans and t-shirts to the workplace but the party stops there. Even though jeans are allowed they must stay "sensible". Why is a litte ass canal so offensive? It's not like a crack is going to cuss out the customers or tear apart a business, it is a simple form of expression that has been banned.

    The definition of sexy is like time through an hour glass, it keeps on changing. For instance, men have taken sexy back. Minds shifted up North from down South. Interest in the butt crack is outdated. You never hear, "wow look at the crack on her" anymore, it's always, "check out that rack". Perhaps, the butt put on a mask and scared everyone's attention away.

If men would stop focusing on the chest, v-neck shirts would also become a thing of the past. The crack was exposed purely to attract men. It was in a way, our form of a mating call. In the 90s, Sir-Mix-A lot praised the butt crack so much, he  wrote several songs, like "Baby Got Back" and "Buttermilk Biscuits", specifically about it. God forbid both go out of style and women have to settle on using wit and charm.

    Therefore, the butt crack is currently the nerd nobody wants to have come over.  It is never invited to parties, never talked to, and never fancied. As a society we have to bring back the butt, start wearing lower bottoms, toss out rules, and rewrite the definition of sexy. A butt crack is like any other body part, so it should be treated just as well. A wise man once said, "whatever floats your boat". The butt boat sunk and I think it is time to bring it back to the surface.